Counselling?

 

Hi! I am writing this here, for my own reference soon in the future.

Some of the things I wrote can be a bit too personal, and I'd be glad if you didn't talk about it with me, in real life. 

So, last Thursday, I went for a counselling session. I waited for 3 months to actually attend the session.

The counsellor was really nice. Okay before anything else, I am not sure if I am diagnosed with depression, but the reason I went to the clinic bcs of it.

I guess, sometimes we are all struggling with our mental health. Except that, someone actually needs professional help. And, I think I need it. It has been 4 years I have been postponing the visit. Initially, I thought, I was just stressed out in the university. No significant incident happened on 2017, I just felt like life is meaningless. By all means, meaningless. I tried, so hard to keep myself composed and calm. I don't think people noticed anything. I was that good. In fact, still am. Hahaha. No matter how hard it takes for me to get out of my bed, I did it, every single time. I am able to make myself get my work done when I had to get it done.

The counsellor asked me, why did I decided to visit her? And, I think honestly bcs I couldn't do this alone, anymore. It was hard. Like real hard. Anyway, the session started with why and how I feel that way. And she asked any traumatic incident or anything that actually affected my emotion badly. Well, I have a few. Mostly related to trust issue and abandonment.

I cried few times while explaining. Hahaha like, my tears just decided to do so. Oh but, maybe because of my PMS and the thing that happened the night before.

All in all, good session. Next session will be on June 2021.